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writingThe 2 WeekEnds

1st  Scene  : Friday Afternoon
(Head camera : Shows door opening, Firoz is walking in. He goes to the kitchen first. Then walks to the room, opens the door. SP is sitting on the chair setting up a game of carromboard)
F : ह्म्म्म, आ गए जनाब भी?
SP :  तुझे छोड़ के मैं कहाँ जाऊंगा.
(Firoz moves to the couch/ mattress and sits back facing SP. SP swivles in the chair to put some music on.)
F : यार  इस  शहर  में  bachelor होना  गुनाह  है  भाई .
SP smiles looking over his shoulder.
SP : क्या  हुआ ?
F : That khanna man. He thinks we tennants have no rights. आज  फिर  गाडी  के  लिए  चिल्ला  रहा  था .
SP(looking at the computer) : what does he want now?
F : he wants me to park my car in the back lane.
SP : क्यों ?
F : he says we can park our cars upfront only after 10 at night, वोह  भी  अगर  parking खाली  हो  तो
(SP laughs)
SP : अबे  उसकी  बीवी  और  बेटी , दोनों  रात  को  लेट  आती  हैं . और  क्या  करेगा . सूअर  साला (slight anger)
(SP turns around to the carromboard and tries out the striker on the board.)
F : carrom. किसके  साथ  खेल  रहा  है .
(camera shifts to an angle right over the carromboard)
(SP strikes the coins and at the same time - )
SP : अपने  साथ
(a white coin and  black coin are potted)
(camera shifts to an angle capturing the large window in the room. Time delay to the night. Darkness. And the title appears – THE 2 WEAK ENDS)

 

2nd scene  : Friday night
Both come back drunk from the pub. (head camera)Firoz opens the door. SP runs in starts putting some music on.
F : क्या  बजा  रहा  है ? कुछ  full power बजा  ना 
ACDC playin(meltdown/two’s up)
Firoz uncharacteristically sings out loud, drunk.
SP smiling : who’s ruling now baby, who’s ruling now?
F : यार  SP तू  मेरे  को  मरवाएगा  किसी दिन
SP : अब  किस  बात का  इलज़ाम  डाल रहा  है  मेरे  ऊपर?
F : अबे  वो  बंदी  यार . Why were you pushing me so much to go talk to her?
SP : अबे, तुझे  नंबर  मिला  ना . वैसे  भी  नंबर  मुझे  ही  मिला  है . मैं  नहीं  आता  तो  तुझे  तो  नंबर  कभी  नहीं  मिलता . चम्पू  कहीं  का .
F : यार  मुझे  पड़ना  ही  नहीं  है  लड़की  के  चक्कर  में
SP : ओये  सिर्फ  अपना  मत  सोच, मेरा  भी  सोच .
F : हाँ  भाई  मुझे  पता  था , तू  मानेगा  नहीं. तुझे  चुप  करने  के  लिए  ही  गया  था  उसके  पास . कहीं  थप्पड़  पड़  जाता  तो ?
Bell rings. Again.
Firoz : अब  कौन  है ?
SP gets up and goes to the door.
(voices in the background)
SP : what do you want?
Khanna : turn the music down. And get ur car out of my parking spot. How many times do I have to tell you?
SP : खन्ना  तूने  time   देखा  है ?
Khanna : this is why I don’t like talking to you when you are drunk. If you don’t do as I say, you will be in a lot of trouble.
SP : क्या , मतलब  क्या  है  तेरा ? भैन्चोद  मेरा  ना दिमाग  मत  खराब  कर . तेरे  को  जो  बोलना  है  तू  जा  के  मकान  मालिक  को  बोल . ये  रात  को मेरे  घर  आके  घंटी  मत  बजाया   कर
समझा  ना
Khanna : तुझसे  तो  मैं सुबह  बात  करता  हूँ . देख  लूँगा  तुझे
SP : जा  न  भोसड़ी  के . बौत आये  तेरे  जैसे .
(Slams the door in khanna’s face. Gets back into the room. Starts pacing the room up n down)
SP : साला  हरामजादा . मार खा  के  ही  मानेगा . अगली  बार  आया ना  तो  इसकी  गाडी  के  सारे  शीशे  तोड़  दूंगा . भैन्चोद  अपने  आप  चुप  चाप बैठ  जाएगा
Firoz : तू  पागल  है  क्या ?
SP : पागल  तू  है  साले . चूतिये . अभी  अगर  मैं  नहीं  होता  ना  यहाँ  पे , तू  चुप चाप  जाके  music कम  करता, उसकी  गाली  सुनता , sorry बोलता  और  आके  सो  जाता .
Firoz : तो  तेरी  तरह  सबका  सर  फाड़  दूं  क्या ? पिछला  watchman, उस  से  पहले  मकान  मालिक. छोड़  मैं  भी किस  से  बात  कर  रहा हूँ . लगता  है  मेरा  ही  दिमाग  खराब  हो  रहा  है
(Firoz dozes off. SP is still pacing the room up n down)


3rd scene : Saturday afternoon
(Head camera : Firoz gets home after his half day at office. As soon as he closes the door behind him, the doorbell rings. He opens the door. Its Khanna and he looks mighty pissed off)
Khanna : Where have you parked your car?
F(meekly) : back lane में  Sir.
Khanna  : I am tired of you. I am going to complain to the RWA. It was serious misconduct last night.
F : I am sorry about that Sir. It will never happen again(tiredness coming in his voice now)
Khanna : tired? दिन  में  हाय  हाय , और  रात  को  धांय  धांय ? You youngsters are shameless. I will see to it that you are thrown out as soon as possible. (turns and walks away. SP is climbing up the stairs as Khanna is walking down. SP has his headphones on)
(Firoz comes and sits back on the couch. Hes murmuring to himself. Cant make out what he is saying. SP comes in, takes a deep long look at him. Takes off his headphones)
F : हाँ  तूने  भी  तभी  आना  था  जब  khanna आया , हैना ? तेरी  भी  आदत  हो  गयी  है (sounds frustated)
SP : क्या  बोल  रहा  था ?
F : please  तू  जा .
SP : क्या  बोल  रहा  था ?
F(in frustration)  : कल रात  की  आपकी  करामात  हमें  घर  से  निकलवायेगी , और  क्या .
(SP sits back in his chair, lets his head hang back)
SP : तू  इतना डरता  क्यों  है ?
F : करे  तू , भुगतू  मैं . अजीब  खेल  खेल  रहा  है ऊपरवाला  भी .
SP : chill मार . कुछ  नहीं  होगा . अगली  बार  khanna आया  तो  टांग  तोड़  दूंगा  साले  की .
(Firoz still mumuring to himself, audible but not clear)
(SP suddenly startles up from the chair)
SP : ओये  तूने  उस  बंदी  को  fone किया ?
F : किसको ?
SP : अबे  कल  रात  की  कटरीना  कैफ  तेरी . क्या  नाम  था  उसका ?
F : Niharika.
SP : हाँ  हाँ  right. Niharika. कितना  सुन्दर  नाम  है . नहीं ?
F : मैं  नहीं  कर  रहा  किसी  को  fone
SP : क्यों ?
F : तुझे  करना  है  तू  कर  ले , phone table पे  पड़ा  है .
(SP quickly grabs the fone and dials the number)
(Firoz is slowly dozing off as he sees SP talking in a haze)
SP(voice fading out slowly) : Heyyyy Niharika(pause). Whats happennig girl?(pause) true, but I m glad you still have my number.(pause) ummmm ok then, we meet up outside The Flinder’s Bar, around 9, wat say………..(fades off)


Scene 4 : Saturday night
(Firoz and SP both are singing loudly, drunk climbing up the stairs. The camera is still the head camera and its looking down showing a pair of jeans clad legs and sneaker underneath)
(The door opens and Firoz heads for his usual place, the couch and sits back)
(SP comes in with a bottle in his hand singing and takes his place on the chair. He puts on loud blaring music – maybe some house or something upbeat)
F : आज  तो  मज़ा  आ  गया .
SP : hmmmm Niharika को  याद  कर  रहा  है ?
F : हाँ  यार , अच्छी  लड़की  है .
SP : अच्छी  तो  बौत  है (he winks at Firoz)
F : you are non-existent brother. She likes real people. People like me.
SP : ऐसे  क्यों  बोल  रहा  है ? I am as real as you are.
F : चुप  बे  साले .(then he laughs hysterically)
(the door bell rings continuously)
SP : पक्का  Khanna होगा  साला . आज  तो  ये  पिटा  ही  पिटा .
(gets up from his chair and runs for the door)
F : हाँ  मार  साले  को . छोड़ना  मत . रोज़  परेशान  करने  आ  जाता  है  हरामी .
(Firoz is getting drowsier and drowsier. He can hear the commotion in the back – Khanna and SP fighting. Slowly Firoz starts passing out)
(Throughout the night firoz keeps waking up in between, drunk and drowsy. He looks around the room, its empty, no sign of SP)
(darkness)

Scene 5 (changeover to still camera, in one of the corners of the room. Looks like SP is sleeping on the couch, with no sign of Firoz. He gets up groggily and winces in pain. He looks surprised to see the bandages on his hand)
To himself : ये  कैसे  हो  गया ?(surprisingly, it is Firoz’s voice, not SP’s)
(He gets up and goes gets a bottle of water. The camera follows him. On his way back, he picks up a letter under the door. He drags himself to the chair SP sits in and slumps in the chair. The room is empty. He has a bad hangover. He gulps down the bottle of water. Hes holding his head. Then suddenly his eyes go to the letter. He picks up the letter)
(camera changes to head camera – the letter boldly says – letter of eviction)
(he raises his head to see SP yawn, stretch and wake up in the same couch and same position that he got up from. He looks and is dressed exactly like Firoz. He has no bandages on his arms)
SP : good morning.(SP’s original voice)              
(firoz doesn’t reply)
SP : वो  हाथ  में  क्या  है ? अच्छा  आ  गया  letter? चलो  किस्सा  ख़तम .
F : कल  रात  क्या  हुआ  था ?
SP : ये  पूछ  कल  रात  क्या  क्या  हुआ  था . तुझे  याद  भी  है  हम  थाने  गए  थे ?(he laughs hysterically now, the same laugh that Firoz laughed last night)
(Firoz pulls the drawer and take out a visiting card and places it on the table)
F  : SP, तुझे  अब  जाना  होगा . मुझे  समझ  आ  गया  है . I am not hallucinating. I need help.
SP : पर  क्यों ?
F  : no SP, we need to split.
SP(bewildered) : but we are already split.
(the camera changes to head camera for SP now. Firoz is seen picking up the card and calling a number)
F : Yes doctor Deshmukh. (pause) Hi, my name is Firoz. I would like an appointment for today.(pause) Any time would do. (pause) no its for me…………………(the conversation trails off as the credits start to roll in and music takes over, firoz is still pacing the room, talking on the phone, the camera is still SP’s head camera)

Well this one has to be read to be enjoyed.

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Writing by

asad aazaad

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